I might be ready to talk.
The thing about a lot of what I’ve been going through lately is that it’s not my story to tell. The biggest of the burdens I’ve been bearing is not my own, and as such, I’m pretty limited in what I can say about it.
I can say this, though: I have carried the burden of another. I have felt the persistent nudging of the Lord to do something unfamiliar and scary. I have wrestled with the inexpressible fear of disappointing the Lord. I have experienced the sting of rejection when truth falls on unwilling ears, and I have experienced the heartache of really and truly not knowing what to do.
I have done all of those things…
…but I have also learned the power of obedience, and the inexplicable peace that comes from doing just what you’re being asked to do. I have felt the hand of the Lord moving me, and I have heard the words of the Lord coming from my own mouth and seen them coming from my own pen. I know what it feels like to push through fear to obedience, and though I have not enjoyed it one single bit, I know that if another similar situation finds its way into my life, I believe that through the power of the only One who can do so, I can handle it.
If that’s what I was meant to learn, I guess I have to be okay with that. Not fun….but sometimes these things are necessary. I can see that.
On a much lighter (and infinitely cuter) note, here is the little darling who accompanied me to church Sunday morning:
I mean, really. Is that not just the cutest? (Major thanks to Michelle for Leah’s fancy pants! They were a HIT!)
2 of your thoughts:
Oh Jessica- you spoke STRAIGHT to my heart almost as if you were speaking from my heart. I, too have been in a similar situation that required obedience, doing something that was very uncomfortable and finding out the cold truth about a relationship. It was/is undoubtedly one of the most difficult things I ahve ever had to walk through. My heart is at peace though and I can lie my head on my pillow at night without one feeling of remorse. Hurt, yes. Remorse, no. Praying for you. You're right...these things only make us wiser, stronger and more fit to deal with obstacles that we will undoubtedly face again.
So good.
And your Leah is a doll. She's getting so big and she is so precious! Love the outfit!
She's so cute. I've been praying for that situation! I felt like I needed to write you a letter about it but I just ran out of time. Maybe God didn't want you to get the letter anyway.
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