No Time Like the Present

I got this feeling the other day that if there are things I want to do in my life, I should do them now. It wasn't a feeling that my life is coming to an end or anything like that, but it was more of a feeling like "What are you waiting for? Your life is NOW!" It reminded me of the quote that says that your life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. People at church are asking me to do different things, like the mission team and to start a big campaign to spread the word about the mentoring ministry we're undertaking, and there was this thought in my head that said, "Well, maybe not now, because I won't get to do this and that and the other thing if I commit my time to this." But then I thought, "Jess, that's never going to change. Things are probably never going to slow down enough that you feel like you can commit to one thing without infringing on something else, so if this is something you want to do, DO IT NOW." Does that make sense? God has given me this time, and only one life to live (please don't think I'm referencing the soap opera), so if there's something placed in front of me that I want to do, now is the time. It was a weird feeling, somehow, like I had had this big revelation, though now as I share it with you it doesn't seem so profound. Anyhow, it was big for me, being one who spends so much time thinking of what I'd like to do later and what I'll do once _______ happens.

Breaking Bread

As I look on Your table, I'm offended at what I see.
Sinners - the worst of the worst - the unholiest of all, rubbing shoulders with You - the very embodiment of righteousness. They laugh with You and share bread with You- question You and have their curiosities answered.
And still here am I, far away, outside, looking in on the merriment. I want to come in.
And suddenly, as I look at You, the only familiar face in the crowd, I see another that I know. The curves of her face and the tears in her eyes are so familiar as I see You pull up a chair for her at Your side.
You put Your arm - Your strong and now scarred hand - around her shoulders, and she sits.
I feel the relief and hear her sigh of contentment...and I recognize her face, at last, as my own. I, the worst of the worst, the unholiest of all, allowed to rub shoulders and even eat with You.

I wrote that Sunday during church. The sermon was on Jesus' revolutionary love for us, and how His radical love for those we see as being undeserving of His attention offends us and mixes up everything we know and believe. I wanted so badly to get it - I really wanted to understand the magnitude of what John (our pastor) was saying. As I was taking communion, it hit me. The people we see as being unworthy of His affection are no worse than I am, and but for the mercy of God I would be exactly where they are. God does not discriminate, and my sins are just as bad as theirs. The only difference is that I've been washed clean and I've let truth change me. At one point, someone could have been offended that Jesus would love someone like me. That's possible, and it's humbling to remember something like that as I accept the invitation to come to the table and break bread with Him. As soon as I got back to my seat I started writing furiously, trying to capture what He had let me see.

No More Smith Girls

Some pictures from my weekend.....

A really cool picture I took of the scene at the altar. Ashley decorated the church with lots of candles and red roses, and this is the cross behind our altar. A church member made it, and it's just about the most awesome cross I've ever seen. Not because of its beauty, but because of the amazing realness of it. Nothing elaborate or fancy, but with three nails to remind us what it's all about.



For some reason it's publishing the pictures in reverse order, so.....


Here's a picture my sister and me singing to "Chapel of Love" right after my toast. We used to sing that song (it's the "going to the chapel" song from the 60s) ALL the time when we were little, and I got the band to sing it as a dedication from mine and Ashley's past to hers and Mark's future. It was sweet.






The happy couple during the first dance.







Introducing, for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Woodard! (That sounds so weird! My little sister is married! She may only be 15 months younger than me, but she's still my little sister.)








The grand finale......you'll be glad to know that this isn't at the wedding, but is from when we were setting up for the reception. I had a little run-in with the cocktail toothpicks. That's one stuck in my finger. I thought Nina and Becca would appreciate this, since you both have an uncanny knack for catching me at bizarre moments.