36 Weeks

When people asked me at church this morning how I'm feeling, my response was simple: "I feel 36 weeks pregnant." I struggled to get going this morning - bad pressure, for one thing, but I didn't sleep well at all last night and was so tired I couldn't bear the thought of a long morning at church. Scott suggested an abbreviated version of our Sunday schedule for me; I left after I did the welcome at the second service and came home and laid down.

I was told this morning that I'm waddling way more than before. I told them that I realize that every time I get up to walk somewhere. "It's right there! Why is it taking me so long to get there?!" It's fun to get comments and reactions from people at church who only see me once a week.

I think I mentioned that I've only been working half-days at work. I do what I can from home in the mornings and head to the office in the afternoons. That lets me keep my feet up as long as I can, while still being productive and doing my job.

I'm really, really emotional. REALLY EMOTIONAL. Last night I was trying to do something on the computer with my pictures and it wasn't working. Scott had his hands full as he tried to figure out why the computer wasn't cooperating while trying to calm down his weeping wife.

I definitely am feeling more uncomfortable. Nothing I hadn't expected, and nothing I can't tolerate, but it's very clear that I'm nearing the end. I have mixed feelings about everything right now. I am really, really excited about meeting this little person - seeing her face and touching her little feet and caressing her little head. I cannot wait until she is real to me. At the same time, though, I'm getting more anxious. I'm getting nervous about labor and delivery, since I just don't know what to expect, and I'm nervous about all the stuff that's going to happen with my body after the fact. Not so much that my body won't be the same as it was before I got pregnant, because I'm actually kind of glad about that. (I like my pregnant body more than I liked my nonpregnant body!) I'm more nervous about the temporary "my body's recovering from this superhuman feat I've just accomplished" sort of effects. I am excited, though, even if it's not completely real to me yet. I don't know how it's still not real, but I really don't think my mind has completely wrapped around what's happening. Can it, really? I don't think so, until she's in my arms. We don't have to wait much longer!